If you ask me, what was the story
you like most when you was still a boy, I will answer without a doubt that it
was “twenty thousand leagues under the sea”, a novel of French novelist Jules
Verne. It is one of the most inspired novels of all time.
My father
bought it to me when I was 9 or 10 years old. It was a beautiful period of
time, because every weekend, my father bought me a book to encourage my reading
hobby. I was very happy about this. I remember that the novel was published in
three parts, each of them had a blue cover with a drawing on it. On the first
part, the drawing was a large ship with a man standing on the bow and looking
ahead via a monocular. On the second, it was something like an electronic
screen displaying a mysterious submarine. On the last part, it was couple of man
and woman curiously looking to the sea. I felt that, to me, the last drawing
was very hard to understand. I didn’t know who were on that picture.
The story
was about a mysterious ship, it was able to dive under the sea, a submarine, as
we called it later. But in the time of the story, submarine did not exist, so
nobody could explain about the appearance of something was as large as a whale
but its power and speed were by far all known creatures and machines on the
world. Some people guessed that it was a sea monster, but other asserted that
it was a human made submarine. Sometime that mysterious thing caused accidents
to other ships running on the sea surface, it made people and governments felt
anxious and angry, so they decided to hunt that dangerous monster at all cost. And
the extraordinary adventure began…
Needless to
say, it was the most attractive adventure I have known. The author described everything
very beautifully. There are four main characters on the story, a French biology
professor Pierre Aronnax and his faithful assistant Conseil, and a Canadian hapoonist
Ned Land, they are three of people who went to hunt the unknown thing on the
war ship called Lincoln; the last and the coolest character was Capitan Nemo, but
I did not know where was he come from, I just knew that he was very rich – “I
could repay the ten billion debts of French government very easily”, said he,
and he did not like people, he made the submarine to keep away from people and ordinary
life. This impressed me so much. The adventure led us through many
wonderful places, we landed on some isolated or history islands, we saw some
unusual phenomena and rare creatures in the deep blue, such as under sea volcano,
giant poulpes, pearls as large as coconut fruit… They went around the world by
this marine and never landed on the mainland. They even reached to the center
of South pole, no one before them could do that. And they trapped by ice for
some days, it was very dangerous situation, but because of the courage and clever,
they escape from this and continued adventuring.
But it was
a sad story. At the end of adventure, the submarine encountered an accident, it
went into a deathly water whirl. Three people, the professor Aronnax, Conseil
and Net were escaped from this accident, and Capitan Nemo and other people on
this submarine voluntarily died with their under water house although they had
time to escape…
As I stated
above, twenty thousand leagues under the sea is one of the most inspired stories of all time. Many young generations have read it, and people will still like it
in the future. People have found the love of nature in this story, and it
encourage to think about new ideas…
"If you ask me, what was the story you like most when you was still a boy,I will answer without a doubt that it was “twenty thousand leagues under the sea”, a novel of French novelist Jules Verne. It is one of the most inspired novels of all time." t nghĩ là câu này có một số lỗi.
ReplyDeleteUầy, một số lỗi cơ à?
ReplyDelete"you liked most" phải ko?
còn j nữa thì t ko biết đấy!
- dùng dấu "..." cho câu trích dẫn trực tiếp nhá!, chứ không dùng dấu ","
Delete- "the French novelsit..."
"My father bought it to me when I was 9 or 10 years old." -> bought it for me
ReplyDelete"On the second, it was something like an electronic screen displaying a mysterious submarine."
ReplyDelete? câu này sai ở đâu hả Gấu?
Deletecâu đầy đủ phải là: it was something like an electronic screen which was displaying a mysterious submarine. Ý cậu là thế à?
No no...
DeleteOn the second one,....
Ờ thế là cách viết mà bỏ "which was" đi vẫn ok đúng ko?
Deleteuh! đúng mà!
Delete"But in the time of the story, submarine did not exist, so nobody could explain about the appearance of something was as large as a whale but its power and speed were by far all known creatures and machines on the world."
ReplyDeleteBạn thấy câu này thế nào? Sai ở đâu cơ?
DeleteĐọc lại thì t thấy rằng từ "but" dùng không hợp lý lắm, vì không có sự tương phản nào ở đây cả, dùng từ "and" có khi lại hợp hơn. Vì t định nói là con tàu này to như con cá voi, tốc độ và sức mạnh vượt xa mọi sinh vật và máy móc trên thế giới.
- t nghĩ là không có "explain about", chỉ "explain the appearance..." là được rồi
Delete- "something as large as..." hoặc là "something which was as large as..." chứ nhét động từ "to be" ở đây như thế không hợp lý.
- cụm "by far" này t không biết từ loại của nó là gì nên không có ý kiến gì, c xem lại rồi bảo t nhá!
In my opinion, câu này sửa như sau:
"But in the time of the story, submarine did not exist, so nobody could explain the appearance of the thing which was as large as a whale and more powerful and speedy than all ...."
thì ngữ pháp sẽ rõ ràng hơn, vì t thấy là cái "to như con bò (ý nhầm cá voi ;;)) với nhanh và mạnh mẽ song song vs nhau và cùng bổ nghĩa cho "the thing".
Có explain about mà, trong từ điển đấy chứ!
Delete"She tried to explain about her fears and anxieties."
Uhm, câu của c nghe hay hơn, gọn hơn đấy!
Còn từ "by far", t mới đọc được nhưng áp dụng sai mất :)). Nó dùng trong câu so sánh hơn nhất để nhấn mạnh. Ví dụ:
She is by far the best actor in Hollywood.
thế thì dùng "by far more powerful and speedy..."
Deletetrong câu so sánh hơn nhất cơ mà bạn!
Deletethế không dùng trong câu so sánh hơn được à?
DeleteKo được!
Deletenếu vẫn muốn dùng thì phải là: by far the most powerful and speddy...
"Sometime that mysterious thing caused accidents to other ships running on the sea surface, it made people and governments felt anxious and angry, so they decided to hunt that dangerous monster at all cost. And the extraordinary adventure began…"
ReplyDeleteHic, đoạn này sai ở những chỗ nào đây Gấu?
Delete"it made people and governments felt anxious and angry,"
DeleteCâu này làm sao hả Gấu?
Deletemake sb do st chứ!
DeleteSao c lại dùng felt (quá khứ)
thật ra chỉ cần "made people and government anxious and angry" là được rồi
Deletesao lại "thật ra chỉ cần", dùng thế có được ko?
Deletephải là made...feel chứ!
tức là c có thể dùng "feel" hoặc không dùng "feel" đều đúng! T thì thích ngắn gọn hơn. Mà hình như natural English cũng chỉ cần make + sb + adj thôi.
Delete"Needless to say, it was the most attractive adventure I have known."
ReplyDeleteCái này phải là "I have ever known" mới đúng này!
DeleteCòn ý bạn là j đấy?
theo t thì là sai về mặt logic, nếu bạn khẳng định là "have ever known" mới đúng thì phải dùng "is" chứ không phải "was"
DeleteUHm. đúng rồi. Thế t nên nói kiểu j, It is hay là I had ever known?
Deletenếu hiện tại vẫn đúng thì dùng "is" được mà, cần thiết thì thêm thời gian vào "until now"
Delete"There are four main characters on the story, a French biology professor Pierre Aronnax and his faithful assistant Conseil, and a Canadian hapoonist Ned Land, they are three of people who went to hunt the unknown thing on the war ship called Lincoln; the last and the coolest character was Capitan Nemo, but I did not know where was he come from, I just knew that he was very rich – “I could repay the ten billion debts of French government very easily”, said he, and he did not like people, he made the submarine to keep away from people and ordinary life."
ReplyDeleteĐoạn này dài quá!
ReplyDeleteCâu nào cũng sai hết à G?
they are three of people who went to hunt the unknown thing on the war ship called Lincoln; cái đoạn này hơi lằng nhằng, tối nghĩa một tí.
but I did not know where was he come from >> came from.
đoạn này cái con khỉ! C nhìn lại đi! Có mỗi một câu. T nghĩ là c nên chia ra thành câu dài, câu ngắn. Và viết lại cho dễ hiểu hơn.
DeleteỜ ờ, ok, tiếp thu ý kiến :)
Deleteviết lại luôn đi! Tiếp tiếp cái gì mà tiếp
Delete"The adventure led us through many wonderful places, we landed on some isolated or history islands, we saw some unusual phenomena and rare creatures in the deep blue, such as under sea volcano, giant poulpes, pearls as large as coconut fruit…"
ReplyDeletehistoric islands
Deletein the deep blue sea << sao m lại viết thiếu chữ sea ở đây nhỉ?!
undersea volcano
gì nữa nhỉ?
theo t thì toàn bài nên thống nhất viết "I" hoặc "we", chứ không nên lúc dùng "I", lúc dùng "we"--> Lỗi logic. Theo t thì c nên viết "I" thì hơn
Delete"The adventure led me through many wonderful places. They landed on some isolated or history islands, saw some unusual phenomena and rare creatures in the deep blue, such as under sea volcano, giant poulpes, pearls as large as coconut fruit…"
còn lỗi c tự tìm ra thì t không có ý kiến gì :P. Về khoản từ mới thì t mù tịt;))
Ờ thì cái đoạn này, ý t muốn viết là "chúng ta" cho nó gần gũi, thân mật vs người đọc. Chả lẽ cả toàn bài t chỉ đc viết là "I, me" thôi à?
Deleteừ! Viết thế cho nó thống nhất!
DeleteHoặc c có thể viết là "led readers..." nhưng nhìn chung là rắc s rối lắm! Nên viết 1 ngôi thôi cho nó trong sáng
"And they trapped by ice for some days, it was very dangerous situation, but because of the courage and clever, they escape from this and continued adventuring."
ReplyDeletecái cụm "but because of the courage and clever" đúng ko?
DeleteNo no...
Deletethế thì
Deletethey trapped by ice
from this
hả?
- trapped
Delete- situation
- clever
- escape
UHm, trời có 1 câu mà sai nhiều ghê!Bó tay! Nguy hiểm nhất là đọc mà ko nhận ra đc chứ!
DeleteAnd they were trapped by ice for some days, it was a very dangerous situation, but because of their courage and cleverness, they escaped from this situation and continued adventuring.
"At the end of adventure, the submarine encountered an accident, it went into a deathly water whirl."
ReplyDeleteat the end of the...
Delete"Three people, the professor Aronnax, Conseil and Net were escaped from this accident, and Capitan Nemo and other people on this submarine voluntarily died with their under water house although they had time to escape…" câu này nên thay "and" bằng "while" thì hơn ấy!
ReplyDeleteơ cái đoạn này, trong bản word m đã sửa từ "and" đấy thành "but" rồi cơ mà nhỉ!
Deletequên sửa ở đây :)
Finish!!!
ReplyDeleteBài này của c trở thành chủ đề hot rồi đấy!:)
Thank you baby! You have got a heart of gold! :)
Delete